If It Makes You Happy -It Can't Be That BadMy mom and I have been butting heads a fair bit the past few days, and she's starting to get on my last nerve.
On Tuesday I had my very first Quidditch game (yes, like Harry Potter, but without the flying bit). I was playing from 6:30-9:30. I live in a neighbourhood when buses are really stupid and infrequent, which makes getting around very frustrating. Now because I knew that I had Quidditch until 9:30, I knew that I would either have to wait until the 10:30 bus, or find another way home. I decided to find another way home and was planning on biking. However I realised I probably didn't want to bike home from an hour after running around for 3 hours playing Quidditch. So I made the decision to park my bike at the place where I would transfer buses and thus get to avoid waiting for the stupid bus that wouldn't come until 10:30. Brilliant, right?
Wrong.
All this managed to do when get my mom super pissed at me.
After Quidditch was over, my team mates decided we were going to go out for food. I was offered a ride home, and figured this would be a great opportunity to get to know my team better.
While I was in the restaurant I quickly texted my mom letting her know that I wouldn't be home immediately and not to worry.
She then proceeded to FLIP OUT, because she decided that I had lied to her and was going to die biking home.
I had texted her earlier in the day letting her know that I had decided to bus to the park for Quidditch (meaning that I was busing part of the way) so that I wouldn't be too tired. I had already explained to her that this was my Plan B, so when I executed Plan B, I figured she wouldn't need must prompting to understand what I meant. Apparently I was wrong.
My mom was livid and I spent the entire time at the restaurant fearing the wrath that would ensue when I returned home. (I was literally shaking out of fear).
It ended up being a non-issue, as my bike managed to fit into the car of the person who was giving me a ride, so I didn't need to bike home in the dark (even though I had a light and was going to be on a bike path essentially the entire time) but she was still upset with the stress I had put her through.
Then yesterday I was sitting around the house before I had to go off to work and was telling her about this amazing graphic novel series I had just finished.
It's called Amelia Rules, and you should totally check it out because it is AMAZING! It will make you laugh and cry and all the emotions.
But I digress. I was telling her about this series and how excited I was to have read it and how I was sad that there were no books in it, and my mom decided I was far too happy and she needed to burst my bubble.
"Why do you like stupid kids books so much?"
Is Amelia Rules a "kids book"? Yes. It is available in the children's section of the bookstore.
Does that mean that only kids can read it? Hell no!
I tried to explain to her why I enjoyed it, and she was having none of it. She had decided that I was being inappropriate for reading books that weren't for adults since I'm an adult.
I tried to explain to her why I prefer YA books to adult books. How I relate more to teenager protagonists than to middle aged ones, but she was still unimpressed.
I got defensive and upset (pretty much because she was telling me that one of the things that brings me the most joy in my life is wrong and I'm not allowed to like it).
My mom then decided that I was allowed to like kids books, but just not be inappropriately enthusiastic about it.
Oh gee, I'm too excited about something that genuinely makes me happy? Sorry, I'll be more apathetic, is that better?
I mean, who says things like that to their children? You like reading and it makes you happy, so I'm going to suck the fun out of it for you. MWAHAHAHAHA
It just makes me so angry. If reading picture books, or YA, or graphic novels, or whatever makes me genuinely happy and it isn't hurting anyone, WHY DOES SHE CARE?! Like seriously?
And it frustrates me to no end how when I get upset with her attacking something I love, or acting like an individual and she says things like "I hope one day you have kids just like you so you know what it's like".
Let's see, I'm independent, I work hard to achieve success in work and school, I help out around the house without having to be asked, I don't do drugs or join gangs or get knocked up or anything that would make me a typical "problem child".
I like to read and hang out with my friends to do nerdy things, yet apparently I'm a terrible person and clearly the spawn of the devil himself.
ARG.
My ten cents: when living with parents, they want things done their way or the highway. There is no room for "negotiation" or "independence". You gotta work with that.
ReplyDeleteUsing that idea in mind, my advice on the restaurant is you could've called her from the restaurant instead of text, present the options available and let her decide. Can't be mad if she told you what she expected. (In theory; requires testing)
As for the YA books thing, opinions are opinions. Your mom's opinion isn't "right", because it's an opinion. You enjoy YA books? Good. Enjoy the things you like. If she doesn't like you liking 'em, well that's that. It's you reading em, not her.
I guess what I'm trying to say is: Why do you care that she cares?
Finally, the "I hope one day you have kids just like you so you know what it's like" thing. That sentence is so open to witty one line responses. The right words could both floor her in cleverness and give her reason to never say it anymore. I can understand getting frustrated, as everyone gets frustrated when they hit a problem seemingly unsolvable. But seemingly is the key word. You'll figure it out. Bookworm. :P